Change of Pace

Maybe All The Strings Broke Inside Him

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Sun, 26 Oct 2008 03:49:17 GMT

EVERYONE SHOULD GO READ PAPER TOWNS BY JOHN GREEN!

I think before I mentioned Brotherhood 2.0, a project on Youtube where brothers John and Hank Green posted a video for each other everyday for a whole year.

Well John Green just published his third novel, Paper Towns, and I'm now here to advise everyone to go get a copy and read it.

It is seriously the best book I've read since Harry Potter. How do I know? Because I couldn't put Harry Potter down, likewise, I couldn't put Paper Towns down. I read it in three days. Which actually would have been one if it wasn't for all the packing, working, and spending time with friends I had to do.

I'm actually in a bind right now because I got his other too books, but packed them away cause I thought it would take me a lot longer to read Paper Towns. Seriously... I'm a very slow reader, I'm still trying to finish One Door Away From Heaven by Dean Knootz, and I've been reading that since Junior year of High School, and it took me months to finish that Death Note novel!

I already mentioned to Windy-sama that she had to read it, and she asked me what it was about. It's kinda hard to explain really, not without giving it away. So I'll just tell you all whats written on the back of the book... or inside book cover, rather...

Quentin Jacobson has spent a lifetime loving the magnificent adventurous Margo Roth Speigelman from a far. So when she cracks open a window and climbs back into his life - dressed like a ninja and summening him for an ingenious campaign of revenge - he follows.

After their all-nighter ends, and a new day breaks, Q arrives at school to find that Margo, always an enigma, has now become a mystery. But Q soon learns that there are clues - and they're for him. Urged down a disconnected path, the closer he gets, the less Q see the girl he thought he knew.

It's really an excellent story.

Though it made me a bit sad cause Q and Margo reminded me a lot of John and me. Only I wish I was as cool as Margo, and I wish John loved me as much as Q loved Margo.

But either way. It's a must read.

Also, Paper Towns is debuting on the New York Times Best Seller list at #5, and it's being made into a movie... and the people that did the AMAZING AWESOME INCRIDABLE Juno, are going to be making the movie for Paper Towns.

You can't get much cooler then that.

DFTBA!

BEST WISHES!

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Sun, 09 Sep 2007 04:47:48 GMT

Yeah, fuck this.

No more blogs.

It's taken over!

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Fri, 07 Sep 2007 00:27:35 GMT

Larri's To Do List:
~~Read chapter one for Computer Concepts~~
~~Read and take notes of chapter one for Sociology~~
Read and take notes of chapter two for Sociology
Read and take notes of chapter one for Business Law
Read and take notes of chapter two for Business Law
Find graph for Econ
Read up on Supply-side change curve for Econ project
Find folders so my bag will stop eating my papers
Locate brain that ran away an hour ago

---------------------------------

I had to take a break from homework. *le sigh* I forgot my books in Carol's car yesterday so now I have double to work tonight too catch up on chapter notes for tomorrow.

I'm not used to this "I actually have to do work outside of school"ness. And it wouldn't be so bad but we get to use notes on our tests, so I might as well write down the info so I can have it. But it sucks so much. @.@;;;

I wish Mr. Barton would let us use our book for tests like Mrs. Lawson, then I wouldn't have to do so much work. Oh well, this is actually making me feel like I'm in college... finally, it's only been what? A YEAR.

I'll live though, and maybe the tests won't be that hard and I won't have to take as many notes in the future.

Well I've still got a lot of work to do, I'm off!

When You Leave My Colors Fade To Gray.

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Thu, 06 Sep 2007 12:20:52 GMT

I should just be happy with what I have. As little as it is, it's still better then nothing.

No, I just can't be happy so I have to open my big mouth.

Ha, it probably would be better if there was nothing though, maybe it would finally crush this false hope I still have of ever being that again.

Probably thinking that everything will be ok in a few days, I'll forget about it.

I never forget.

But I can act... I'll just go back to playing my role again, until I get another chance to fuck it up.

I'm not a mean person, I just want to kill everyone

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Thu, 06 Sep 2007 01:37:06 GMT

So, I am really enjoying our new classes. They're classes I would necessary like, but after having basically the SAME class for the past year, it's pleasent to have a change, to actually sit through discussion and lectures instead of sitting in front of the computer making YET ANOTHER stupid business identy. *headdesk*

Computer Concepts so far is the most boring of the classes, sitting in the media room watching the crappy Power Point and listening to 112 year old Lupin/Snape mumble on about computers that are older then the Millennium Items... blargh. Then he keeps asking if we remember using any of this stuff... yeah, right. I remember the first floppy disks, from Kindergarten!

But I have to say the picture he had of the FIRST apple computer, was very amusing. Basiclly a wooden keyboard with no monitor and a plank sticking out of it with "APPLE" burned into it.

We have to read chapter one by, some time... I'm rather confused on what really I'm supposed to be reading because there is NO chapters in the book, there's a section one, which is spilt up into A and B... so do I read the whole section, or just A? Or what?

All I know is that when I flipped through it and saw a title saying "How to browse the internet" I wanted to stab myself in the eye... I don't need to read this, I've been living on the computer for like twenty years.

Econ is the best, which is odd, but the teacher is so cool. I sat in the front row today and for once I actually was part of the disscusion. Not that I really helped since I said that we could solve the problem of there not being enough islands for everyone by decreasing the surplus population. We also discussed rather we should be able to sell babies and organs, which I think should totally be legal, selling organs would save lives, and babies too. But what do I know, I want to kill everyone so I can have my own privet island, castle, and golden swan bed.

Soc. and Business Law are fun too, cause I sit int he back with Carol and Carrie and we make editoral comments about everything the teacher says.

I think it's going to be an awesome term.

YGO:TAS, The best thing to hit the internet since my FanFiction

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Wed, 05 Sep 2007 12:21:28 GMT

It's so weird to see old classmates after you've graduated. It's even more weird to see them in the most unusaul places, random places you thought you'd never see them.

Like a couple months ago when I randomly bumped into Josh Case... at the Battle Creek Target, of all places.

Yesterday I saw another random classmate walking down the hall of IBC. Brian George. And it wasn't just someone like looked like him, it was him, name tag and all. It was just so odd.

But the kicker was when I went into the drawing room to find my computer and he was in there too!

Brian George is in the Graphics Program!? Does anyone else find that odd? He didn't very much of an artsy kid in school. We were never close though, so what do I know.

I probably would go talk to him sometime, but I doubt he remembers me, I don't think we've ever really talked before.

He'd probably recongize me if I wore my make-up one day, you think? XD

Good Thing I'm Sitting Down, Or This Show Would Be Canceled.

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Wed, 05 Sep 2007 00:08:19 GMT

I think that I should be too happy to feel like I'm missing something. Things have been so good these last two weeks... but I'm still finding myself crying at night before I go to bed. I know I should just be happy with what I have... but, I still feel so empty inside. Whatever.

Today was the first day of the Assoc. program, and it was a lot better then I thought it would be.

Classes mostly consist of reading chapters and taking a test every week. With the exception of the major paper we have to write in Econ. Not too bad though, going to attempt to write it on Canada's econmy. XD

I also got my desktop today, I have it all set up now, so I'm sitting at my desk in front of my desktop, typing this blog on the laptop in my lap.

I'm such a dork. I have to use the laptop mostly though because it has internet. And a signal I can get in my room. "IBC PIMPS" is my connection now, screw you Clayton.

Internet, a new computer, cool classes... what more could I ask for?

Well... No, I won't be selfish. I'm in a good mood, and that's cool.

Have I blogged about the new roommate yet? Well she's awesome too. She let me use her room for internet access, which I don't need now. She's clean and good with sharing. Which is good cause me and Carol shared everything in the apartment. I don't think she smokes either because she made her boyfriend smoke on the front porch while they were here.

I approve.

Anything else?

Oh yeah, our Computer Concepts teacher looks like a cross breed between Snape and Lupin from Harry Potter. We're all so amused by it.

I think that's about it for now. =D

*peace and cookies for everyone*

O_O WTFHOLYWOWBBQ!

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Mon, 03 Sep 2007 01:18:14 GMT

So, I was sitting in my room playing Sims and watching Corpes Bride when all of a sudden I glance to my wi-fi connection and behold! I had one bar of signal!

"Nah," I thought to myself, "It just must be that placebo internet connect 'EXTENDED HAWKIN', nothing to get excited over."

So and clicked to see who I was connected too, shock shock! It was Clayton!

Clayton? I can barely connect to that in the other bedroom, no why it would be working all the way over here.

*opens internet browser expecting nothing and Myspace comes up*

O_O WTFHOLYWOWBBQ!

*logs into Myspace and browses for five minutes until the signal cuts out*

The important thing was that I was connected in my room. I think me and Clayton are making great progress in our futile attempt at an internet realationship.

Well, I slept in till 3 in the afternoon and I haven't done much of anything today. I love staying at the apartment over the weekend because I can get away with doing nothing all day and not feel guilty about it. At home mom expects me to do things like clean, and dishes, and what not. Psh, I'm only staying there two days every other week, I think that quilfies me as "guest", and guests shouldn't have to do things. (But I do them anyways without being asked because it makes her happy, and living with Katie alone this whole time Lord knows she needs SOMETHING to make her happy)

Today wasn't a total loss though, I did go shopping. Which I hate because no matter how few things I buy and how light they are by time I walk all the way home it still feels like I'm carrying a load of bricks. I'm just weak. Pleh.

Other then that I've been playing Sims and watching movies all day.

My Sims amuse me so much. I love screwing up everyones lives (except for my own, which is perfect). The major sims I have right now are my family, me, Katie, Billy, and Mom.

Mom's old now, and actually achieved her life goal of becoming head of the business career track. But some how she turned into a lesbian and got engaged to her co-worker Pamula. They're not going to get married though, since she's currently trapped in the shed in the back yard. She just won't die fast enough, so I have to kill her off.

Katie still lives at home and has Love as her aspiration in life. She's currently in love with three different guys, and despite that she is engaged to one of them and has a kid with each guy she sleeps with. (in this version you can only have four sims in the house at one time, which is why I need to kill Mom off, Katie needs to have another kid). Fun fact, she also got pregnant with her second child in the dressing room while trying on clothes. And Rose, her oldest child, hates her now because she witness her mother flirting with her future siblings future daddy. (oh I'm so evil)

Billy was actually doing pretty good until I decided to mess with him. He's popular and even has like ten best friends (something I've never accomplished before, go me!) he devolped a crush on two sims, Cara and Vamsi. Vamsi was his maid. He eventually took a chance and fell in love and married Vamsi. Then they had a son, Velcro. But Vamsi soon got bored of the married life (because she had the Love aspiration too) and started hitting on Parker, the new maid that came to take her place. Shortly after reaching his life time goal of becoming Mayor however, Billy came home from work one day to find Vamsi and Parker in bed together in some hot maid on maid action. At once Billy broke up with Vamsi and she ran off with Parker, so now he's a single parent. I might make him continue his quest for Cara's heart, who knows.

Then of course me, I married *cough*John*cough* and had two sons, Mathanal and Zion. John made it to the top of the Gaming industary, and even though that was his life goal, the game didn't seem to recongise that. Stupid game. I'm at the top of the entertainment business myself. Mathanal maxed out his logic skills before he became a teenager, so his aspiration is Knowledge, and his life goal is to be a mad scientist. Oh yeah, and we're the richest family in the neighborhood. X3

Oh yes, I'm having much fun with my Sims.

I can say that you're above average baby, well not really, but you're good enough for now.

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Sat, 01 Sep 2007 13:42:49 GMT

In just a half an hour the new roommate(s) will be here. I don't know rather I'm getting one or two now. I still want it to be the one... it would be easier for me to coax her into letting me use her room for internet access. I'll have to work harder if there's too... and I don't like work.

I'm in here soaking up the last bits of internet before I have to leave. *sponges*

I wish there was a way to bottle internet and save it for latter. Like in those DSL commericals where they cut open the cord and squeeze DSL out on their hands and then do something a lightening speed, like the dishes.

Come on, if you can do something at lightening spead using DSL you'd do the dishes? I'd use it to crank out a kick ass flash site for lariakaiba.com... something I will do eventually after I get my desktop.

Well, I don't really have much to say other then that I don't want the roomies to come.

I had a signal all night so I didn't start getting ready for bed until midnight, and before I went to sleep I wanted to move all my stuff out of the living room and into my room. So I can hang in there if I don't like the roomies. But before I did that I had to figure out where everything is going.

And I had to find a new place for my desk because where it was located I would have had to plug my Mac into the socket run by the light switch, so every time I'd turn off my lights I'd turn off my computer.

So instead I put my tv on that side of the room, and my desk on the other... it makes the room seem more cluttered, but at least I won't turn off my computer every time I leave the room.

My problem then was where I was going to plug in my tv, I didn't want my tv to go on and off with the lights either. So I had to run an extention cord from the socket under my bed to the tv. Unfortently that was the same cord that I plugged my phone charger and laptop cord into. So now I can only use my laptop on that side of the room, and if my phone rings in the middle of the night I'll have to get up to get it.

*le sigh*

But yeah, I have so many things plugged into my room... I think eleven things plugged in to a four socket room. o.o;;

I hope I don't short out.

Ok enough nonsense, I should go. See you all tuesday when I get out of class and back to the Mac Lab *huggles iMacs*

We Don't Need To Find Weapons of Mass Destruction, We Just Need To Want To Find Them!

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Fri, 31 Aug 2007 13:40:04 GMT

Even if by some miracle the check comes in the mail for the Mac today I still won't be able to get it because I have no way of getting it home. Carol didn't come into school today because we're just getting grades today and she probably didn't want to drive all the way from Kokomo just to get grades (that takes two seconds) and then drive all the way back. And I doubt she'd drive it just so I can transport my Mac from the school to the apartment.

If I get the check though I could cash it and then pay for it, that way it really would be sold and belong to me hopefully further ensuring that no one but me takes it.

That's only if the check comes in though... So I shouldn't hold my breath.

This is the last day of the diploma program, after this I'm going to an associates student. I can't believe it's been a whole year since I moved down here. A year ago today, I believe, I was just packing up the car and getting ready to come down here to move into the dorms.

A year.

These last four months have gone by so fast... the next four are probably going to be faster. Before I know it I'll be graduating, and then finishing up my last few classes, and then moving back home, all before Christmas.

I want to be out of here, but I don't want to leave so soon. I'm going to miss my class. We're like a family.

Since it was the last day of the term, and I already mentioned before, we got our grades today, finally.

Me and Carol both got straight A's.

What is this the third of fourth term I've gotten straight A's? I've lost count. It'll probably be the last time though because we're actually going to have real classes the next two terms.

Next Terms Schedule:

8:55 - 9:45 -- Computer Concepts -- 209 -- Slager
9:50 - 11:35 -- Macro Economics -- 213 -- Lawson
11:40 - 12:30 -- Sociology -- 207 -- Barton
12:34 - 1:25 -- Business Law -- 207 -- Barton

... That does not look like a fun schedule. At least we get to sleep in though since class starts an house later. I get to reset my alarm to 7:40 now. Woot woot!

Hm, not much else is going on... oh yeah, we might be getting two roommates now instead of the one... that sucks.

And apartently my apartment smells really good because that's what everyones been saying when they come in.

"Hi I'm here to check the apartment... *steps in* It smells really good in here!"

You're face smells really good in here, suck it! I got straight A's, fools!

The Blood Is Rushing To My Head! Blacking Out! Blacking Out! Blacking Out!

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Thu, 30 Aug 2007 14:33:32 GMT

Well, Grandma was supposed to have sent the check in the mail this morning. I don't think I'll get ti by tomorrow, so I'm going to have to wait until Tuesday to get my computer. Stupid Labor Day.

They set my tower, monitor, cords, keyboard, and mouse off to the side and put "SOLD" signs all over it. Three of them. Anyone that touches that computer would die, I even threatened Mr. Brooke's life today because he was taking like fourteen of the computers away.

Carol got hers today and I poked around on it deleting users and making her account the Admin. Well, Ben made her account the admin, but I'll be able to do it myself once I get mine. All the files and everything are still on there. *whee*

Anne Marie came by last night for inspection, she was impressed and said that our apartment was the best she'd seen so far. And it smelled good. Of course my apartment smells good, I wouldn't have it any other way.

Harvest fall type scent in the living room, Lavender in the kitchen, and I have vanilla in my room.

The Harvest ones the best though. But I'm going to get Macintosh Apple next time I go because Carol liked that one, and it makes the apartment smell like the house in Quincy.

More good news, we're only getting one roommate! Anne Marie said that everyone coming in this year was preppy, and she didn't think we'd get along to well. Ah der. Marideth, I think her name is, according to Anne Marie "isn't goth, but she isn't prep either, but she listens to rock."

Great, because you know, her rock will go nicely with my "Weird" Al and Wizard Rock. Lol.

Oh well.

The roommate doesn't seem so bad yet, we'll just have to wait until Saturday to see. *crosses fingers*

In Canada!

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Wed, 29 Aug 2007 16:54:08 GMT

So, all the trials I've been having with Maccy 2.0 and everything that has been going on has been so worth it with what I've been gifted with this week.

Remember I told you all that they were getting the new iMac computers in Mac lab and would be selling the old ones? Well not only are the iMacs THE GREATEST PIECE OF TECH I'VE EVER SEEN/SMELLED/TOUCHED/TASTED, (Note: I didn't actually taste them, but I bet they taste good) They're selling the old Macs for $200.

TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS!

Not only that, but all the programs, and our files are still on them.

Freehand, Dreamweaver, Flash, QuarkXpress, everything!

Do you know how good that is.

So what if the Macs are five years old, they're full of great programs, TWO hard drives, plus we get the monitor, keyboard, and mouse with it too.

I haven't been this happy since... I can't even remember when I've been this happy.

I went in today to reserve mine and Carol's computers, and monitors. This is so great!

Now all I need to do is wait until the check from Grandma and Grandpa get here. When I get home again I'm going to give them the biggest hugs!

Grandma also told me today that she got her very own MacBook today. Jim is messing with it right now, but once she gets it back I know she's going to be very happy with it. Macs are so much easier to use than Windows. And she's actually going to get decent internet over there. It's about time! I still remember all those nights I spent on that piece of crap windows on that piece of crap dial-up. It was a nightmare.

Still no internet connection at the apartment... I hope in the next couple weeks after the new people move in some one signals will pop up. But if not, I still have my Sim, and a desktop to mess with.

The new roommates are coming Saturday. I'm not very excited about that. But screw them, I have a Mac Desktop that only cost $200, so they can suck it.

I Can Spoon All Of You!

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Mon, 27 Aug 2007 03:52:45 GMT

Thanks for all the support guys. My cord going to crap on me seemed to be the final straw and I had a total meltdown last night.

And yeah, I know all my siblings are single and rather enjoy that... I would too if there wasn't somebody that makes me feel like this... I can trust him with anything, when we're talking and I'm upset about something I can just go off and rant about what ever it is and he'll listen to me, even if he doesn't really understand anything I'm talking about... and he can make me smile so easy, being with him just makes all my other problems go away... I feel complete, like I'm actually worth something.

I donno...

Today was good though. I decided before I gave up all hope on Maccy I'd try the cord again, and it worked today!

Guess I just over heated it last night. *shrug*

Then today I went to Isaac's 17th birthday party. It was just as much fun as last year.

We cooked food out over the fire pit he has in his back yard. Me and him attempted to make a fire... got two good flames, but over all failed miserably. So he got Earl to do it. Robbie cooked the food and it was really good.

After we ate and gossiped we went inside to watch Rent because Me, Liz and I think Kristin hadn't seen it.

I didn't really watch it though because Isaac's sister had a puzzle out, so me and Adreah were too busy trying to put it together. It was so funny.

Adreah: Ooo It's John Smith, he's hot.
Me: Yeah he is!
Adreah: Look, he's laying on the ground.
Me: and Pochahontis is on top of him!

XD such a dirty puzzle.

Me: Oh! I found Arial's boobs!

Kristin helped on about half the puzzle too, and we actually got I'd say about 80% of it done. I'm rather amased.

What I saw of Rent was good, I need to find time (away from puzzles) to sit down and watch the whole thing... though it makes me sad because of the song "Season of Love" since we sang that in choir. T-T

When it Rains, It Pours

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Sun, 26 Aug 2007 04:56:18 GMT

It can't rain all the time... unless you're talking about my life.

Yesterday was the best day I've had in such a long time. Portfolio day, I got Maccy 2.0 back, Ms. S came by the school, I went out to lunch with the SGB's, I finally got to come back home, our Red Vs. Blue Dvd's came in...

Happiness can't even last a day, can it?

Not only does Maccy have nothing on it... it'll probably stay that way for a while because now (OF COURSE) my power cord melted and yeah, it's dead too.

WHAT THE FUCK!

I'm so fucking pissed at it, it can't even work for a week, A WEEK AT LEAST, before it has to fucking die on me.

It's stupid, but the only reason I'm so upset about still not having a working computer is that I want to talk to John... I haven't really got to talk to him all month because of lack of internet signal, and now Maccy decides it wants to be a peice of shit on me.

I'm just so lonely... and pethtic... and jealous.

Everyone around me is hooking up, I feel so left out because there isn't anyone out there that would want to be with me. I'm just sick of it. I swear if one more person says anything about not being able to see their signifagant other I'm going to stab them in the fucking throat.

At least they have someone... fuckers.

Yeah, yeah, yeah... I'm being selfless again.

And, yeah, I know you all love me and care about me... you do or else you wouldn't be reading this, right? But you're too far away.

I feel so alone.

I'm fucking glad that the new people are coming after this next week... because I'm getting scared of staying there alone. I just feel like somethings going to happen... like someones going to break into the apartment and kill me. I feel like there's already someone fucking in there with me. Watching me.

Thursday night I couldn't even sleep because I was too scared. I swear I got up and checked that i made sure to lock my bedroom door like every five minutes.

I don't know what to do.

Well, now that I've gotten completely off topic of what I wanted to talk about.... New Power Cord: $80... It always feels like somebody's watching me... Can anybody find me somebody to love?

Get Out of My House!

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Thu, 23 Aug 2007 21:13:59 GMT

So today was fun.

We had to move all the tables and clean EVERYTHING in the room because we're having our Portfolio Day in the drawing room tomorrow.

That place was so dirty, it took us (me, Ali and Kayanna) hours to clean off all the tables and set up peoples boards and portfolios. I even swep the floor three times and we still need to sweep again and mop. We're just waiting for Jess to finish up her board before we mop.

We even got our books for next term today, which is weird because we usually get them the first day of class, but this time we got them a week early.

I'm totally not looking forward to the classes... Business Law... Econ... Intro to Computers... Sociology.

Well, Sociology isn't that bad because that's an awesome class. Bu COME ON! Intro to Comps? Hello! I don't need that. Psh.

But computers means I'll have a source of internet during the day, so yay me!

I can't wait for portfolio day tomorrow. We don't need to dress up, but I'm going to anyways because I'm gonna hang out a while. Our classes boards are the best. Arthur even made little holders for our business cards to put on the boards. But only like the people in the "Awesome Corner" has them.

I call it the "Awesome Corner" of course because mine is right in the middle. =D

I called my mom last night so she's going to come down after work to see my stuff. (I mostly just did it so she can take me back to Quincy but, whateve) I also ran the idea of getting one of the school macs by her so she could maybe run it by the grandparents. But she probably won't remember and as soon as I know the price for them I'm going to call them. I might even go over and talk to them this weekend.

One last thing before I go.

I was reading the fifth book to the Tarot Cafe manga (which FINALLY came out after like seriously TWO YEARS) and in the back was a preview for another manga "Ark Angels".

It's about a group of three sisters that can travel through demensions and time to save endangered animals and put them on an ark until humans learn to be be well, not stupid any more. It was actually really good. But the best part was that the three sisters seriously remind me of Snow, Windy and I.

Shem, the oldest sister is Snow. Of course because she's the oldest sister! (We even fit our roles in the birth order =D) She's really nice and happy all the time, but has a firey temper if you make her mad. There was other stuff too, but I don't remember right now. XD

Hamu, is the middle sister, and thats totally me. She complains about everything and even though she is very beautiful (don't really agree with that but eh, people tell me I'm pretty) she hates all men. Which I pretty do, with the exception of one ^.^;; And she's like always hitting someone on every page. XD That would be me.

And then there's Japheth, the youngest, and Windy all over. The story is from her point of view mostly and she's just quiet and innocent and has to put up with the crazy antics of her sisters. (to true) I only read the first chapter but I bet she's the smartest of the group, just like Windy. And probably the most levelheaded.

I'll probably start looking for that now because it was a good story (well the chapter I read was) and it's also by the same girl that does Tarot Cafe (I think)... it'll give me something to read while I wait another TWO YEARS for the sixth book for that. Sheesh.

I can't wait till tomorrow!!!

I Need Money

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Wed, 22 Aug 2007 17:14:24 GMT

So Friday the Mac Lab is getting new computers, and if I don't get my files off the school computer I'm going to lose them as well.

Maccy picked a very *LOVELY* time to commit suicide on me. </sarcasm>

But, the old computers are going to be sold, and students get first dibs. Heck yes!

Omg I'm so excited over that. I need to find out how much they're going for and then beg my grandparents to give me the money for it as an early graduation/Christmas gift.

I'm going to be asking for a desktop anyways, and if I get it now from the school it'll be soooo much cheaper then buying one new from the store. Plus after this whole ordeal over Maccy dying, I need SOMETHING to help me keep my files intact.

It'll be a great career move and everything!

And I can play my Sims game... even though I just bought one to play on Maccy... which I want to play but he's still in the hospital.

Omg, I really hope I can get one of the computers, espically if I can get my computer, because I just love it so much. Maybe Maccy was jealous because I loved my school computer more then him. That's why he was so emo. T-T

I'm a bad mother.

In other school related news. I'm finished with my portfolio, board, and electronic portfolio! I'm all done with everything! Yay!

Portfolio day is Friday and tomorrow we're going to be cleaning the room for it. I'm excited, Mr. Brook looked at all my stuff and he absolutely loves it. I can't wait to show it off to everyone else in the school.

I. Totally. Win.

There's One More Angel In Heaven... There's One More Star In the Sky...

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Tue, 21 Aug 2007 19:15:24 GMT

The Mac Place called yesterday... Maccy's hard-drive is dead, and there's no way to retrieve the files.

All my stories, pictures, movies... everything from the past year is gone.

They said they'd call when he was ready, and they haven't called back yet. I wish they would. I want my Maccy back.

Even though he won't be the same Maccy I knew and love... This is the closest I've come to having someone close to me die. I know it was just a computer, but you Computer junkies out there *cough*Mikari*cough* know that you're computer is not just a computer. It's like... a part of you, or your brother, or child or something.

It just means more to you then anything else, because it's your link to those who care about you... or, it was my link to those who care about me.

Yes, I still have my phone in the mean time so I'm not completely alone. Carol and Daren would text/call me every so often over the weekend to make sure I was still doing ok and hadn't killed myself out of boredom. But without Maccy I don't get to talk to Windy or Vanilla... or John...

I know, I know, everyone reading this just rolled their eyes.

I just feel so lost right now.

The weekend I spent reading my old fanfics, mostly "My December", which I read about four times. I keep forgetting how good (and overly descriptive) that one was. I think that one might my favorite now instead of "Myself".

Why can't I write more stories like that?

Other then read I watched all my musicals, multiple times. Phantom, Joesph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat, Music Man, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory... ok so that last one wasn't a musical, but it has music in it, so it should count.

I also played my gameboy a lot. Yugioh and Tomigothic, woot woot!

Monday I had an appointment that I had to go too down by Jefferson Point. Carol said she could take me down there since it was 2, right after class. But we've been getting heavy rains down here since Saturday and they went further south to Peru where Carol was. It was raining so hard that she couldn't see her car from the front porch of her dad's house.

It finally became obvious that Carol wasn't going to make it up here in time, or ever, so I had to find some other way over there.

I hadn't gone to school because of the rain, but around twelve thirty I walked over here in search of anyone heading in that direction after class. Brandon said that he could drop me off if I helped him with his flash. So, me being God and all, sat down and did two weeks worth of work for him in fifteen minutes. All he needs is a nice little intro and he'll be done.

Getting back from Jefferson Point was also an issue. I asked Ali which buses I could take to get back to the Willows, or at least Scott's, because I know she rides them every day.

I just love how helpful our class is. We're all like one big family. Like when we all went down to help Jess win tickets to see Dave Matthews Band... we didn't win but we were still there for her (and free bagels and coffee, but that's besides the point).

Well I got over to Jefferson Point with plenty of time to spare before my appointment. I was glad that I had filled out the paperwork before, so that saved me a lot of time. I was in and out by two thirty.

Then came the adventure of getting home. Ali said there there was a bus stop near by at Berlington, which I had no idea where that was. So I wondered around the parking lot for a bit until I spotted it. luckily it was a covered stop so I could sit out of the rain while I waited. And also I was fortunete to have had my Phantom book with me to occupy my time.

After about a half an hour of waiting the bus finally came. I was a little scared because I have never been on a public bus before, and I was all alone. The bus driver wasn't very nice, and there were only two other people on the bus, who got off not long after I got on.

I was dropped off at Meijer where I had to take a smaller bus that when further west and to the Willows. The first driver said i would have to wait another half an hour for that one.

By this time I was almost three thirty in the afternoon, and I hadn't eaten anything since earlier that morning, so I quickly ran inside to get something to snack on, hoping that I didn't miss the bus.

I didn't, which was good.

The second bus driver was much nicer, and it seemed that I was the only on the bus that wasn't a regular. I was rather shocked when I got on because one of the ex-co workers from McD's was on there and she recognized me. I was rather relieved to see someone I actually knew. I sat with the rest of them while they waited for the bus that would take them downtown came. Then I was on my way home.

I didn't get home until four-ish, but I was just happy to have gotten home at all.

I really need to learn the bus system better so I can get around more. I can actually go places when Carol's not around... though, I don't really know where all I'd be going.

... I miss Maccy!!! *huggles Maccy Plushie Mikari gave me*

Once I rose above the noise and confusion, Just to get a glimps behind this illsion

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 18:36:58 GMT

I haven't heard back from the Mac place yet. I hope Maccy is ok.

Thanks Matt Matt and Mikari for offering to donate. I hope it's not so much that I'd ACTUALLY need it. We estimated around $300 for it... but it all depends really on what has to be done, and how long it takes to do it.

This weekend is going to be horrible. No one can come pick me up so I'm stuck in Hell.

Stuck here with out anyone to talk to, nothing to work on... nothing but worrying about my baby.

Carol offered to take me with her, but we'd probably end up being stuck on Tori's all weekend... and Tori's cool and all, but I just don't feel comfortable there with all the drugs and what not. And I don't feel much like drinking this weekend, I'm too depressed for that.

But, I've got a few more Yugioh mangas to read, and batteries for my gameboy, and many episodes of Scrubs, Invader Zim, movies, and what not to watch.... Though, what I really want to watch is Yugioh: The Abridged Series and Red Vs. Blue.... Gah.

I'll get to sleep in as late as I want. And maybe I'll get some writing done. Spend the whole weekend working on a new story or something.

I wonder if I have a notebook around somewhere... I might have to pick up one a the store. I have to get some milk and some food stuffs to eat anyways.... can't get too much though because I only have $15 to spare and I have to be able to carry it home.

Damn, I thought having no internet was bad... having no computer at all is worse.

Well, I'm going to update Strange Ramblings and Random Events before I get kicked out, maybe I'll have some nice reviews to come home too. And nice blog comments too.

... If I live that long.

._.

P.S. I find it interesting that I got a mouse as my daemon, since Tupaws in "The Sad Cake" could act like Laria's daemon. (not that I know what daemons act like since I haven't ever read the book... but you know what I mean right?)

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R.I.P. Maccy

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 21:17:02 GMT

I had to send Maccy in for repairs.

It seems it's emo-ness got the better of him and finally commited suicide.

Problems for now appear to be that the Mac isn't reading the harddrive correctly, or the harddrive is fried. I'll probably have to get a new one. I really hope they can back up all my files... I will be so lost without them.

My life is on that thing. My stories, my pictures, my songs... I don't know what I'd do if I lost it all.

It's going to cost me too. I don't want to dish out that much, but if it's the only thing I can do to get Maccy well again, then I'll do it.

There are few things in life that I would do anything for, Maccy is one of them. He IS my life. He is my only link to the people I love. I don't know what I'm going to do without him now for the next few days. I thought I'd go crazy from the lack of internet? I'm going to have a total breakdown with no Mac at all.

The apartment is so lonely now that it's just me.

Please pray for my Maccy and let's hope he doesn't come out of this will too much memory loss.

P.S. Anyone want to donate to the "Maccy Needs a New Hard-drive Fund"?

Fuck the Fucking Fuckers.

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Wed, 15 Aug 2007 00:48:39 GMT

What's wrong with parents these days? Seriously, why do they have to tear their children down just because they've never done anything good in thier lives?

I wish I could feel what they're going though so I can help them somehow. I feel like such a horrible friend because I can't do anything to help them.

One of my friends is suffering, she had low self-esteem to begin with, now her mom has completely crushed everything for her. What is this shit about not being able to get anywhere with an Assoc. Degree. Bull shit! Yes it would be better if she had a Bacholers, but she's still young and has a whole bunch of time to get it.

Shit, she's already done a whole bunch of stuff for REAL people, organiztions that are actually going to be using her work. Not even out of school and she already has business.

Not going to get anywhere my ass.

I'm so fucking jealous, I wish I cared enough about my life and career to go out and find people to make stuff for. I'm the one that's not going to get anywhere.

Then another my other friend, his mom is badgering him because he doesn't have a job, and he's "not trying hard enough". He's a Junior in High School, he doesn't need a fucking job. And she goes off on him for not calling the guy back for an interview right away, he was busy. I think that's a fucking good indicator that he doesn't have ENOUGH TIME for a job.

Come on, bitch, he's already doing Cross Country, Band, Science what not, he's probably in ALL the honor classes and god know what else. There's only so much a kid can take on! Fucker.

It angers me so much that parents think they can treat their kids like this. What the fuck is wrong with them!?

Unforently there's nothing I can do, and that makes me more angry. I'm such a fucking horrible friend.

My Opinion Doesn’t Matter

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Mon, 13 Aug 2007 17:33:22 GMT

So, you'd think after living with someone for almost a year you'd be able to tell the major things that piss them off right?

Apparently not.

After Carol came home last night and babbled on for an hour about Tori and Megan nonsense that I care nothing about, she says that Anne Marie called to ask if it was alright if we got a smoker as a roommate and if she could turn the apartment into a smoking one. Of course Carol said that she didn't mind, not even taking into account how I'd feel about the situation.

EXCUSE ME!?

How long have you known me? How many time have I ranted about how much I hate smoking, and smokers, and smoke anywhere near me?

I guess she just most tune out when I talk about that, which is ok I guess since I go to my "happy place" anytime I hear the mention of Tori, or Megan, or Chris, or any other dramafied bull shit she's going on about at the time.

To say that I'm a little mad about this would be an understatement.

I love how she calls Carol and asks her if it would be alright, "You smoke sometimes so you won't mind."

HELLO!?

Carol hardly stays in the apartment, every few weeks she finds new loonies to hang out with and gallivants off to Peru or Kokomo every night, that is until she does something to screw it all up and she then has to find more mental asylum rejects to cling too.

*I* am the one that lives in that apartment more then anyone else, and my opinion doesn't matter at all?

Carol's all excited about it, "Yay we wont have to stand on the porch anymore in the middle of winter to smoke."

IF YOU WANTED TO FUCKING SMOKE YOU SHOULD HAVE PUT THAT DOWN TO BEGIN WITH SO I WOULDN'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS BULL SHIT.

What, the fact that I wrote down that I wanted to be in a NON-SMOKING apartment doesn't apply this year? Do they think I changed my fucking mind?

If you think I'm over reacting about this then you can just go screw yourself, I have a right to be angry. I hate smokers for a reason.

One, my lungs are bad enough as it from years of living with my mom and aunts and everyone else around me that smokes. I don't need them to get any worse, considering my mom doesn't care about my health at all. My lungs could deflate and she'd just laugh and say it was a fucking allergy.

You know what, it is a fucking allergy, TO YOUR FUCKING SMOKE!

Two, a smoker just doesn't smoke cigarettes. EVERY smoker I know also smokes pot and does other drugs. E.V.E.R.Y. I DON'T WANT THAT SHIT ANYWHERE CLOSE TO MY BEING.

It was bad enough with Allyn, now I've got Carol smoking pot in the apartment. I don't need anymore druggie rejects in my life. God knows I've got enough to deal with because of my fucking family.

Today I'm going to go down and ask Anne Marie if she can switch people so I won't have to live in a smoking apartment, or if she can move me out and into another non-smoking apartment. Because if I have to live with this bull shit for the next three months, I'm not going to be a very pleasant person to be around.

P.S.

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Sun, 12 Aug 2007 01:17:36 GMT

But LK is my idol! T-T

Your Silver Bullet Tongue is What Did My Heart In.

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Sun, 12 Aug 2007 01:16:40 GMT

No, I can't just leave it at that. Touch on my depression and then just let it linger like that?

This has been eating me away for weeks and since I haven't had my blog I have anywhere to vent.

I am torn between my feelings. On one hand, I haven't been this... content in a while, but on the other I'm depressed and dying inside.

I feel to fucking selfish. Shouldn't I have taken the hint by now that he doesn't want to be with me? I'm just wasting my time holding on to nothing like this.

I've been saying it for ages, why don't I ever listen to myself?

There might have been a chance... but now with the lack of internet I only get to talk to him like once a week... it's so hard.

I just want to be closer to him. I want him to be mine again. I want it to be like it was.

It never will though. I've already had my chance, and I blew it.

I should just be happy for those who do get to be with someone they like. After all, what I want has never mattered. And it's already been proven then I'm not worthy of love.

Fuck it, it doesn't matter.

I cried so heard it was mistaken for laughter

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Sun, 12 Aug 2007 00:43:04 GMT

It's been a long week.

One where I wish I had internet for all those nights I was up until four in the morning watching Scrubs.

You see, I told my dad about my cough... which I didn't really have to tell him about since I can't go at least two to three sentances without hacking up my lung. So he told me to get some Primatene. Along with cough syrup for night time, and Halls for class.

Yeah... side effects, nervousness, tremor, sleeplessness.

Not so much neverousness as depression.

So all day I felt really shakey, all night I couldn't sleep, and everywhere in between I was randomly bursting into tears while watching Scrubs.

Joy.

Top it all off, we had to have our WHOLE portfolio laid out with creative resume, labels, and all that fun stuff by friday.

Now I missed all but one day last week, so this week I had to gather the rest of my files, print them, cut them out, layout the portfolio, make my creative resume, redo my business cards because my paragraph symbol kept turning into an 'F'.... it was crazy. But I go it done... somehow.

I showed it off to everyone here, they all loved my stuff. And Grandpa said I can make a full color ad for the QHS band christmas concert to run in the Shopper... just as soon as I actually figure out how to do the CMYK he was talking about... I was so totally on another page at the time. I'm sure I can ask Mr. Brook about it.

Also between last weekend and now I've played match maker with, I guess I can say two of my friends. (even though I can't stand and want to kill one of them) ... But now it's just made me depressed.

When is it going to be my turn to be happy? It would only take one person to make me happy, one person to actually commit to what he says to me.

I guess I'm just not good enough... I never have been, and I never will be.

Super Special Awesome Quiz Addition!

lariakaiba@hotmail.com — Mon, 06 Aug 2007 17:55:12 GMT

What role would you play in an anime show?

You're the one with the biggest attitude!You are the demon hero!With a reputation of killing and creating chaos, you were surprised that the group accepted you in the very beginning. You are the main characters best friend, and help him or her whenever they need it. You're strong and a quit wit, shoving the insults toward your friend right back where they came from. You're strong and one of the best fighters. Nothing can stop you from getting what you want.Quote: "Mess with him/her, you mess with hell!"Position: Smart one
Take this quiz!

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Due to the fact that I never do LJ cuts I've forgotten the code X3 go me!

Stolen from Mikari and Snow:

Leave a comment if you want to know what I really think of you, and I'll reply and tell you. No lies, all honesty. Post it in your journal after I do yours so I can see the reverse.

How will you be suspended from LJ? by Anonymous LJ User
Username
Years on LJ
Snape
Hours left until your suspension	39
Your crime	Posting all that damn porn!
Who reported you	littlekuriboh
Your fate	On usenet, kicking it old school.